Photo credit: Christine Pienaar Photography
“My love, today is the big day. I have been waiting for this moment for so long. Today, I stand infront of our friends and family and promise to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Your wedding vows. Many couples choose not to write their own wedding vows and I personally feel it is because they have no idea where to begin. As much as having 100 sets of eyes on you isn’t daunting enough, adding in emotional words to exchange is a lot of pressure. I totally get it! Although I have never had to personally write wedding vows for myself I have written for and assisted couples with their own and they never have regrets. Friends, please take the time and share your heart with your partner on your wedding day. Whether you are getting married this summer or next you still have time. It is a special moment that you will not regret AND if you cry, it only adds to the special moment. I’m sharing a few tips below to get you started.
Let’s begin!
Be true to you:
Keep your vows personalized and honest to you and your partner. These words are for you and your sweetheart. This is a moment to share your whole heart with them. If you are funny, be funny or if you are sincere and genuine be that! This is a promise to each other and it should be a reflection of you.
“You are my best friend and I am so excited to call myself your wife. You support me, laugh with me and allow me to be the truest form of me. It is a sign that we are meant to be and that you are my true other half. You have shown me what true love is.”
Short and Simple:
Before writing your vows have the conversation regarding length of speech. You wouldn’t want to pour your heart out with several paragraphs and your partner say two sentences (awkward!). Aim for the same length and perhaps share your vows with each other. Sharing your vows with one another may make it easier and less nerve wrecking as you know what to expect from the other person. I always recommend four or five lines.
Ask for Advice:
This is your first time and it can be very overwhelming on where to begin. Consider asking a friend or a family member what they shared in their vows, how they found inspiration and perhaps some marriage advice or quotes to help you get started.
“Today, I promise to love you through life’s celebrations and challenges we may face, to support you, inspire you, hold your hand and steal kisses with you and to fight for us everyday in our marriage. You are my once in a lifetime and I cannot wait to begin our next chapter of our love story. I love you!”
Write it down:
I have seen it time and time again the couple that trys to memorize it for the ceremony. Don’t be this person! Print your vows on beautiful cardstock (excuse to add in your wedding colours) and read them to each other on the day. Don’t cause yourself stress in that moment and instead have that backup there just in case. This way no detail will be skipped and you have a beautiful keepsake after the wedding to frame 🙂
My challenge to you:
There are no expectations! From now until the wedding I challenge you to keep quotes, ideas and favourite moments in a folder to look back at when the time comes to begin writing your vows. Go to your favourite coffee shop and have a vow writing date with your fiance. Great excuse for a date night and it will keep you focused on your vows. Share or keep it a secret, that’s up to you. Remember to not put too much pressure on yourself and think of it as a love letter to your partner.
Answer these questions:
I love you because…
I promise…
Favourite moment of our love story together…
I can’t wait for…
I am so excited for you to begin writing and just know that I am doing many happy dances and cheering you on from behind my computer screen. If you need assistance with writing your vows, contact me. I love this stuff and would be honoured to guide you through the process!
Happy writing!